I want to commitment is what makes a solid foundation in marriages. Since commitment is an ongoing process, it is important to think about and work on your relationship and commitment often. Here are three ways you can strengthen the personal commitment in your marriage:
1) Plan and Try to Commit.
Cultivating a great marriage requires commitment (Goddard & Marshall, 2010). It is important to have commitment not only when you begin your marriage, but in the day-to-day tasks of marriage as well. Commitment is a choice and choosing to plan and commit to your marriage will help you and your spouse grow a committed relationship (Goddard & Marshall, 2010). One way you and your spouse can plan for commitment is goal setting (Temple, 2003). Setting goals for the future as a couple can join the two of you towards a common purpose and improve your commitment. If you and your spouse have a goal of buying a house, and strive to work towards that goal, you will have greater commitment and purpose together. Other goals may include getting out of debt, going on a vacation, remodeling a room in the house, or saving for your children’s college education.
2) Think and Act to Strengthen Your Marital Commitment.
Your behavior will reflect your marital commitment (Goddard & Marshall, 2010), so act in ways that will be positive towards your marriage and strengthen your commitment. Often couples will get married and think marriage will be much like dating: great conversation, good food, exciting times, and endless affection (Goddard & Marshall, 2010). These couples don’t understand strong marriages take work and commitment. You can strengthen your marital commitment by showing your spouse in actions and words. For example, be available to chat with your spouse when they have had a rough day. Support your partner by listening to and encouraging their dreams. Make room for quality time with your spouse. These are ways that let your spouse know you are committed to him/her.
3) Notice and Appreciate Your Spouse’s Commitment.
Remind yourself of all the positive aspects of your partner (Temple, 2003). What do you love about your spouse? What are you thankful for? How have you grown from this marriage? Think of a time when your partner made a difficult decision in order to invest in you and your relationship (Goddard & Marshall, 2010), or a time when their commitment was specifically shown to you. Positivity is a powerful tool and when it is strong and consistent in relationships, they are much more likely to flourish, and commitment is increased.
There are several ways you can strengthen your personal commitment to your marriage. It may be helpful to find time to sit down with your spouse and make a list of how the two of you will work on strengthening your marital commitment. Commitment is an important aspect of marital happiness and satisfaction. Making sure to continually work towards and check in on your commitment will help you to have a strong marriage.
References
Temple, M. (2003). Strengthening Marital Commitment. Retrieved June 20, 2017, from http://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/strengthening-your- marriage/commitment/strengthening-marital- commitment
Goddard, H. W. & Marshall, J. (2010). The Marriage Garden: Commitment Make and Honor Promisest. University of Arkansas Cooperative Extension. https://www.uaex.edu/health-living/personal- family-well-being/couples/marriage- garden.aspx
Research by: Dr. Dave Schramm and Jennifer Viveros
Utah Marriage Matters 